Part of the family, life, work Juggle Struggle that I often completely forget about is having fun.
Am I right?!
Sometimes I don’t remember how to have fun.
I’m not talking about having family fun, where you try to go somewhere that is fun for the kids. I’m not even talking about date-night fun, where you and your partner try to do something together for at least an hour that isn’t just talking about kids and logistics.
Nope, I’m talking about something YOU find fun. Something that makes you laugh, something that gets you a bit excited, something that sets off your happy hormones, something that makes you feel happy on a most basic level.
When was the last time you did something like that? Can you even remember?
Here’s perhaps an even more important question: do you know what fun looks like to you now? Because I’ve found that what I find fun as a working parent is quite different from what I found fun in life BC (before children).
Part of my struggle with going back to work after maternity leave has been figuring out how to have fun again. In my twenties I pretty much had fun all sorted out. It usually involved drinking, and friends, and clubs, and dancing (so much dancing!) and eating chips at 3.30am, and having a ginormous hungover lay-in.
When you have a kid, they’re up through the night and super early in the morning, so having a hangover is basically not an option any more. Once you have one hangover with a toddler you vow never to have one again.
Also, turns out that clubs (those remaining that didn’t have to close down during covid) are SUPER NOISY and full of people in their twenties, and none of my friends are in them because they all have kids too, and we’re all too knackered to stay out until 3.30am.
So what does fun look like now? I’ll be honest, after 4 years I’m still figuring that out. I’m determined to make room in my life for trying some new things that I might find fun. Because otherwise all that space gets swallowed up by kids and work and chores and food shopping and and and…
If you can’t remember the last time you had some fun – do this with me right now;
- Take out your diary
- Find a slot that you could use for having some you-fun (remember, not family fun, this fun is specifically for you!)
- BLOCK OUT THE SLOT – it might be 2 weeks away, it might be 2 months away, but make sure it’s there
- Arrange childcare if you need to, make clear to your partner/family that you will be unavailable at this time
Now that you have a slot booked, you can explore some fun ideas that you might try. You’ll no doubt have things to consider like how much time you have available and what you can afford, but even within those boundaries try to think as big as you can.
If you’re struggling with ideas, here are a few to get you started:
Indoor fun
- Going to the cinema
- Roller Skating
- Escape room
- Listen to a funny podcast (or any other type of podcast you enjoy)
- Baking
- Challenge yourself to a jigsaw puzzle
- Play a game you really like (darts, monopoly, whatever’s your bag)
- Karaoke
Creative fun
- Paint a picture
- Take a pottery class
- Dancing!
- Make a photo scrapbook
- Upcycle some furniture
Outdoor fun
- Go for a walk somewhere really pretty
- Go for a bike ride
- Go to a festival
- Take part in a colour run
- Go to a theme park
If none of these are floating your boat then ask the internet – there are thousands more ideas out there.
Something else to consider is whether you want to invite others into your fun-time. Do this with caution though and don’t let them monopolise it into something that they find fun but you know that you won’t – this is supposed to be your fun window remember? As working parents we don’t get many of those, so you have to protect and make the most of them.
Drop a comment and let me know how you get on with trying out new fun things. And don’t forget to get your next fun window booked in your diary soon after the last one!
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